Written by Stephen Russell, directed by Stuart Davids.
Lloyd wakes up to a morning full of regrets: an empty bottle of tequila and Theresa in his bed with morning coffees. Theresa wants him perky, since he’s got a very busy morning ahead of him. *cringe* Theresa goes to Dev’s to get some food supplies to nurse Lloyd’s hangover so he’s “good to go” and lets it slip to Michelle, Molly, Dev and Umed that the food’s for her and Lloyd, ahem. The look of shock is astounding. Darryl sees his mum and she informs him that she’s had “sexual relations with a gentleman friend” and the gentleman friend is Lloyd. She then sees Lloyd drive off looking the other way in his cab. Theresa’s clearly disappointed and Darryl rubs it in.
Lloyd later hides in the cab office and insults Claire’s singing talents when Theresa walks in ticked off at him and then leaves because Liz walked in. Liz apologizes to Lloyd about yesterday and how rude she was to him. She then asks him if they can go out for a drink, date-like and kisses him goodbye.
Lloyd later finds out about Theresa had let the cat out of the bag about their evening to the folks in Dev’s shop and asks them to keep quiet about it. He then walks into Darryl and finds out that he knows about Theresa too, and Darryl criticises him for scummily driving off on her – she’s not a piece of dirt. Darryl tells Lloyd he won’t tell anyone about Theresa, since he doesn’t want anyone knowing either.
Lloyd confides to Claire that if he and Liz get back together, he’s going to be honest with her about Theresa. Theresa comes in and Lloyd tells her that he wants to get back with Liz. He then apologizes for leading her on and offers her a bottle of liquor as a consolation prize. Theresa doesn’t know what to say – it’s more than she usually gets for one of her notches. She takes the liquor and leaves the cab office without so much as a look back. Theresa walks into the bar and asks for a lemonade. Oh boy. Lloyd walks in and Theresa watches with pain as Liz ushers him into the back room.
In the back room, Lloyd is honest with Liz about having a one-night stand with someone. Only, he doesn’t mention who that someone is. Liz is happy that he’s honest with her, and they snog. Only, it doesn’t look like Liz is too happy about knowing this truth. Honesty’s overrated sometimes. Liz goes and takes a swig of something hard at the bar and Michelle, seeing this, asks what’s wrong. Liz tells her that Lloyd’s admitted to her that he had a one-night-stand. Michelle is relived and tells Liz that she’s been in a panic all day since she knew about it, since she saw Theresa in the corner shop buying breakfast for her and Lloyd. Liz looks at Theresa and then to Lloyd and says “you slept with that tragic slapper?” All the sudden, Theresa smashes some glasses and asks Liz who she’s calling “tragic.” Let the games begin! Theresa punches Lloyd in the nose when he gets between them. Theresa then challenges Liz to a fight outside. The shoving match begins and Liz drags Theresa out of the pub. Then Darryl, Lloyd and Ken get involved in breaking it up. Theresa says that Liz can have him since he’s rubbish in bed. Liz says she doesn’t want him if she’s had him – he’s a virus. Liz tells Lloyd that she can’t even look at him.
Theresa takes her angry straight into Dev’s with Darryl in tow where she goes behind the counter and proceeds to help herself to the liquor selection. Dev finds her swigging on some unpaid-for vodka and tells her that he’s sacking her from the kebab shop and tells her to get the ‘ell out. Dev then tells Darryl that he’s taking Theresa’s tab money out of his wages. Ouch.
Theresa then goes into the cab office where Claire has been tending to Lloyd’s bloody nose with an obscene amount of cotton batton. Doesn’t he know he’s supposed to pinch the bridge to make the bleeding stop? Anyway, Theresa breaks down in tears and tells them she’s been kicked out of her flat and fired because she slept with him. Lloyd goes to reach into his pocket, but Theresa declines and says she’ll manage, she’s not a prossie – yet. Poor Theresa! She was just a girl, that liked a boy…
Lloyd is like a dog with a bone, and takes a nice big bouquet of flowers to Liz. Lloyd does his best grovelling, but Liz tells him to shut up. She then tearily asks him what he sees in her and why he thinks they’re a good couple. He says that she makes him laugh, and there’s surprises, and he makes her whole. Liz tells him that he’s no better than Theresa. He doesn’t care about himself and he doesn’t care about her. Lloyd says he lovers her for her, they’re good for each other. Liz begs to differ. She tells Lloyd to go and take his flowers with him.
Theresa finds Lloyd coming out of the Rovers and angrily banging the bouquet on the hood of the car in tears and turmoil.
More marital woes for the Dobbs as Tyrone complains about their lacking love life. Molly further insults Tyrone by asking him if he’s bi-polar(bear) or clinically depressed because he’s upset about her coldness towards him.
Kevin asks Tyrone why he’s in such a bad mood lately. Tyrone asks Kev if he’ll go for a drink with him after work because he wants to ask him some personal questions about Molly. Kevin nervously accepts his invite. In the Rovers, Tyrone asks Kevin if Molly’s having an affair. Uh oh. Their conversation gets interrupted when Kirk takes a seat and starts wittering on. Kevin says that he has no idea, Molly was just acting normal. Kevin tells him that he’s probably barking up the wrong tree. Feel guilty yet, Kevin? Tyrone tells Kev that Molly never seems to want him. Kev tells him that she’s all he talks about.
After their conversation, Kev runs over to Dev’s and tells Molly that Tyrone asked if she was having an affair. Kev wants to know why Tyrone is onto her. Molly says she hasn’t been getting on with him lately, since she’s in love with someone else. Duh. Kev asks if if it’s time to “call it a day” and she thinks he might be right. Molly wants a definitive answer from Kevin – are they on or not? Oh, please say this is the end! Won’t somebody stop the madness?! Oh, spoke too soon – they’re on. Ugh.
Leanne is ready for the bank meeting regarding their new bar venture. Peter tries to assure Leanne again that he’s solid and won’t fall for the liquor in the bar. Ken saddles up and tells Peter that he regrets what he said last night to Peter.
It’s bad news when Leanne comes back. The bank won’t lend them the money for their venture, not even with the bookies as collateral. They are going to try a few other banks so as not to give up hope. Hope – I hear it dies last.
Later, Janice confronts Ken and Deirdre and tells them that it’s not Leanne’s fault that Peter’s an alcoholic. Ken says it’s her fault that Peter wants to open a bar, however. Sean opens his mouth and tells Liz about Peter and Leanne opening a bar across the road. Needless to say, Liz doesn’t look happy about the thought of future competition.
Ken realizes that Peter has decided to open the bar in Turner’s Joinery and tells him that brings a whole new level of stupidity to the idea. Deirdre says that if they open a bar there, then it’s to do with everyone in the street. Isn’t it always?
Kirk has packed his bags and has decided to move out of Maria’s. He moves further on down the row of terrace homes and asks Tyrone if he can stay. He better get his feet under someone’s table because Eileen’s door is next and he won’t be getting any hospitality there.
Maria has bought baby Liam’s christening outfit and she’s getting ready for the ceremony. Side note: When Tony came down the stairs – I’d never seen a stuffed shirt look so good. Barry and Helen have arrived, and Helen is doing her best to be civil. Her best isn’t good enough, trust me. They leave Tony out front to take their luggage into the house. It’s like Christmas has come early for Tony. Lol. Tony thinks that Barry and Helen are trying to get Maria and baby Liam back to Ireland with them. Maria promises Tony that she’ll never move to Ireland.
Michelle goes into Dev’s and argues with him over the smell of kebab in her flat. Dev figures she must have been able to realize that if she lived above a kebab shop she’d be smelling a “hint of shish.”
At Underworld Rosie thinks that Sean’s sewing is suffering because of his “sausage fingers.” LOL. Luke and Tony seem to be getting on worse than ever. After Tony leaves, Luke gets on the phone to his lawyer’s office and leaves a message for him to call him that night, it’s important, very. Luke’s lawyer gets back to him, but it’s bad news it seems. Something to do with him being stitched up, and no shares etc.