No Bullying By Parents: Fri Nov 27, 2009 Corrie Episode Review

Janice is happy that Hayley is going to be back working at Underworld.  Hayley asks Janice is she thinks there will be any resentment towards her from the factory girls.  Janice sarcastically tells her that no, there won’t be.  Janice says she’ll get no bother from her, at least no more bother than anyone else that would have been in that role.  Haha.  Janice can’t help but rub Sally’s nose in the fact that Hayley is new management, and not her.  At Underworld, Carla makes it know that she wants to be referred to as ‘Mrs. Connor’, no more ‘Mrs. Gordon.’

Carla’s busy sweettalking all of Tony’s clients over the phone, when Hayley comes in asking about what her job description entails.  Carla says that she works in the office, kissing client ass, and Hayley takes care of everything on the floor.  Carla tells Hayley she has to nip out for a couple of ours, to somewhere not nice at all.

Michelle sure wears a lot of black, has anyone else noticed that?  Is she constantly mourning her youth or something?  Ryan says he’s going with her, to let Tony know that he’s going to kill him when he comes out of prison.  Michelle tells him he’s staying home since she can’t deal with him getting in trouble on top of everything else.

It’s Tony’s hearing, and Michelle and Ryan are sat there, when Carla walks in.  Michelle is holding back the tears as Tony is charged with his crimes.  Tony looks over and sees Carla sat in the back.  When Tony leaves, he gives Carla a half smile.  Only, Michelle doesn’t know that Carla’s sat behind them and goes berserk when she thinks Tony’s smiling at Ryan.  She yells at Tony not to smile at her son, then spits on the glass separating them, telling him she spits on him.  Carla watches close to tears as Michelle breaks down in the court room.

Michelle waits for Carla outside the court room and asks her if she knew her husband was a murderer.  Carla asks her if she’d believe her if she told her she didn’t know.  Michelle says she probably wouldn’t believe her.  Carla tells her that she didn’t know, and doesn’t want to be shouted at.

Carla returns to Underworld and pours herself a large glass of booze and tells Hayley to tell the staff that Tony’s been charged, and if they want more they can show up to court themselves.  Hayley tells Carla she must be devastated by all this.

Michelle later tells Ryan not to let the stuff that happened in court let him down.  Wow, stuff just rolls of her back.  One minute she’s spitting at glass, the next she’s laughing at Christmas displays.

Tyrone’s digging into his breakfast in his vest looking as attractive as he possibly can while Auntie Pam overlooks in disgust.  Pam offers to bring Tyrone his lunch so Molly won’t be late for work.  Pam tries to suggest to Tyrone that Molly needs a night out, maybe to the pictures.  Tyrone insists that it’s cheaper to eat in and they don’t have to dress up.  Tyrone’s not biting though.  I suppose Pam’s no longer wondering how Molly fell into Kevin’s greasy arms.

Pam goes into Dev’s to tell Molly that she’s got to get Tyrone trained now, since she’ll have to spend the rest of her life with him.  Molly’s more interested in just cheating on him actually.  Much easier to take advantage of someone else’s already-trained man.  Pam is honest with Molly and tells her that she’s worried that Molly hasn’t finished with Kevin.  Molly denies it and says she has.  Pam tells Molly that she deserves a husband who worships her.  Doesn’t she have one?  Molly gets on the phone to Kev the second Pam leaves the store.

Kevin and Molly meet at his place, and we know where this is going.  Kevin tells her that this is his house, and he wants her in HIS bed.  His, and SALLY’s bed, their marriage bed to be exact.  Uh oh, it seems as though Sophie’s arrived hom with Sian in KEVIN’s house early.  Kevin and Molly are snogging in bed, and they hear the girls downstairs and freak out.  Kevin gets up and tells Molly to wait.  He puts on his dressing gown, and asks Sophie if her mum’s home.  Sophie wonders what he’s doing in his dressing gown and he says he’s getting changed.  Another close call for Molvin!  Molly tells Kev she was almost hoping it was Sally who would catch them, so they could just get it out in the open.

Molly and Kevin meet later at night, and talk about their relationship.  Molly thinks it’s time they come clean to their families.  Kevin agrees, saying his girls are nearly grown up now and all.  Wow, is he really going through with this?  Kevin figures he knows his family will be knocked sideways, but he can’t please everyone, can he?  Kevin asks Molly if she’ll leave Tyrone and start a new life with him.  Molly agrees, of course.

Well, Theresa’s moving on up in the world.  She’s having her hair done in the salon by Audrey “snobby” Roberts.  I suppose Theresa’s a kept woman now.  Theresa and Betty are gossiping over Maria’s life with Tony when Audrey tells them that there’ll be no gossip about Maria in that salon.  So, the ladies start to gossip about Gail instead.  Audrey tries defending Gail and Joe, saying that Joe only had a small addiction to pain killers and has sorted his life out of money issues.  Betty tells her that for a good hair dresser, she’s a terrible liar.

Theresa brings some desserts to Lloyd in the cabbies and he complains that he’s going to be fat.  Theresa tells him she’s looking after him, doesn’t he like that?  Watchout Lloyd, last man she looked after she was poisoning.  Lloyd asks Theresa to just be nice to Liz to make his life easier.  Theresa says she’ll try for his sake.

Theresa sets out to fulfill Lloyd’s desires and is phony-nice to Liz and Liz isn’t having it.  Liz tells Theresa to go back to her usual miserable self, because “nice” isn’t suiting her.  Theresa agrees and tells Liz she looks like mutton dressed as lamb, except a lamb would have more dressings.  That does it, and Liz kicks her out and bars her and Lloyd.  Poor Liz!

Audrey visits Gail and asks for a word in private.  Gail assumes Audrey is there to chew Gail out again.  Gail tells Audrey that her picking Gail’s life apart has become very boring and very predictable.  Gail asks if Audrey remembers the day she married Alf.  Gail asked her why she was going through with it, since Alf wasn’t her type.  Audrey said, at the time, because Alf was safe.  Audrey says she doesn’t recall that.  Gail says that Audrey was sick of excitment and wanted to settle for someone that would put her on a pedastal and never hurt you.  Audrey says that she loved Alf, and Gail retorted that she loved Joe.  Gail acknowledges that there’s been problems, and there could be more along the way, but she’s willing ot take a risk on loving someone who loves her.

Gail tells her that she’s going into her marriage with her eyes open.  Audrey wonders if she should just sit and watch Gail make a mistake.  Audrey, that’s what being a parent’s all about.  You’d think she’d have gotten that by now.  Gail tells her that she could enjoy her life with her, because life’s hard enough without having to fight.  Gail tells Audrey that she doesn’t see the man that Gail sees.  Gail tells Audrey that she’s not like her – she’s not good on her own.  Audrey tells her that she doesn’t want Gail to be alone, just with someone better.  Gail asks Audrey to accept Joe for her.  Audrey tells Gail to not expect her to buy a new outfit.

Audrey sees Joe outside, and tells him that she’s going along with Gail’s wishes, but if he steps one foot out of line, she’s coming down on him like a tonne of bricks.  Joe asks what he’s really done wrong.  Joe claims to be just a man, an average Joe perhaps?  Joe says he wants to spend the rest of his life with Gail, and to give him a break.  Audrey just stalks off.

Liz goes into the cabby office looking for a cab.  Lloyd says the he can drive her, but she declines and requests another driver.  Lloyd follows Liz out and tells her that they’ll have to face another sometime, but Liz says she just doesn’t want him in her personal space.  Theresa shows up around the corner and assumes the wrong then, then tells Liz that Lloyd has moved on.  Theresa can’t leave well enough alone and defends Lloyd and accuses her of acting like she’s 5.  Liz tells her how she acts has nothing to do with her or Lloyd.  Liz tells Theresa if she wants to keep coming to her pub, she’ll keep her opinions to herself.  She then adds the Theresa got Lloyd on the rebound.  Zing!

At the butcher’s, Graeme is entertaining Claire and Ashley will all of the bad names he was called throughout his childhood, heck, life.  Ashley’s afraid that Becky’s going to tell all the other mums that Amy’s picking up swearing from Joshua.  Claire just wants Amy to stop swearing.  Claire complains about how she’s always been the outsider with the other mums.  Graeme figures it was because she got locked up, and that can put people off.  Ashley suggests that Claire get herself involved in this, to make some friends.  I thought she was involved in tons of extra-curriculars already, no?  She’s just not very amiable.  Graeme thinks that Claire needs to find a place with like-minded people.  Such as Wives-Who-Henpeck weekly?

Uh oh, Claire’s new “hobby” is acting.  Graeme and Ashley are stunned as she does her rendition of the Charlston in the butcher shop.  I’m acutally enjoying Claire like this. She’s almost a little half-in-the-bag seeming.  Maybe she traded that cuppa for a glassa wine.  Graeme, of course joins into her chorus line.

Becky shows up to Bessie Primary to get Amy and lights up a ciggie.  The clique of mothers all look at her and let her know there is a new no-smoking sign.  It’s clear that Becky’s not in the “mum’s club” either.  Claire watches this, and says out loud that she should put up a sign, “no bullying by parents.”

Claire stops by the Rovers later, and tells Becky that she thinks the two of them are quite similar people, much to the disbelieving looks of Liz and Becky.  Claire says that she doesn’t think either of them make friends easily.  Claire tells Becky that she’s joining a theatre group to make some new friends.  Becky reckons she must be desperate.  Claire invites Becky along, but doesn’t get a response back as she chokes down her cider.

Eddie Windass is spreading the xmas spirit, by being “that house” that has all the lights on it.  Anna asks her not to spread himself on the pavement.  Gary says it’s embarassing, then Anna and Eddie break out into a carol, much to his further embarrassment.

Rosie just can’t stay away.  She goes into the cafe to tell John she’s signing up for Weatherfield College, then orders a custard slice and some orange juice.  Rosie tells John that it’s down to him why she’s going back to college.  She has a sneaky look on her face.  Up to no good, as usual.

Fairy Godmother: Thu Nov 26, 2009 Corrie Episode Review

Written by David Lane, directed by Ian Bevitt

Sally wants to have a word with Molly over the books and calls her a dimwit.  She is a bit of a dimwit.  It would seem that Sally left the door open to Underworld the night before.  The factory girls are wondering what they’ll do without management when Carla shows up to everyone’s aghast stares.  You’d think it were the second coming!  Carla announces that she’s their fairy godmother.  That’s not what I’d call her, but sure.

Carla immediately demotes Sally and tells her to get back to her machine.  What a demeaning job!  The factory girls demand to know what’s going on from Carla since they feel they have a right to know what’s going on.  Carla makes it clear that she’s in charge now.

Tony gets his final charges read down at the station, to which he confesses guilty to.

Next stop: Underworld for our detective.  He tells Carla that Tony’s confessed to all.  The detective tells Carla that he cannot find Jimmy Dockerson, so he was wondering if there was any information around Tony’s office leading to his whereabouts.  Carla tells him that she’ll have a look, and that she wants to find Liam’s killer as much as he does. Too bad she thinks she already has killed him.

Carla asks Sally to help her look for some paperwork on Dockerson.  Sally doesn’t look too happy to go through all the Underworld paperwork to find anything on that customer.  Sally finds the paperwork, then mentions that she’s used to skipping on her lunch to keep the business running.  Sally tries her bestest to get her PA position back, but Carla’s not biting.  Carla takes the paperwork on Jimmy Dockerson and proceeds to shred it.

Carla goes to the cafe upstairs to see Roy, but he wants nothing to do with her. Carla tells Hayley that she needs her, that she needs help at the factory.  Hayley says she’ll never step foot back into Underworld again.  Especially since she can’t leave Roy right now.

Maria’s packing up her stuff, and giving the rest of her items to a charity shop for her move to Ireland.  It would appear that Kirk is going to watch after the house and Ozzy.  Yay, at least Ozzy is staying.  Maria bids Kirk and Ozzy goodbye as their taxi arrives.  The Connors see Carla across the street and give her the evils as they pack into the cab for the airport.

Molly is still being quite standoffish towards Tyrone.  Molly was tossing and turning all night.  Maybe from the anticipation of whether or not Sally has found out about their affair.  Tyrone makes a comment about Maria and Tony and how Tony is rich, older, and Maria should have stuck to her own kind.  Tyrone figures that Maria is “one of us” down to earth people, and tells Molly that he and her were made for each other.

Molly has been on edge all day, and Kevin finally comes into Dev’s to tell her that it was only a misunderstanding.  Molly freaks out that Kevin hadn’t told her earlier.  Then Kevin warns her that Sally wants to give her hell over the books.

Molly goes over to Sally’s place with Kevin, since Sally wanted to see her.  Sally tells her it’s her lucky day since she’s got bigger fish to fry at Underworld.  Sally nevertheless gets right into it with Molly over the books.  Kevin says that a lot of the discrepancies are most likely his fault.  Molly says that Sally’s right, and she does the books better than her.  Sally says she has had a lot of experience.  Now they’re just mocking her, how terrible.  I can’t wait to see the back of this affair.  Sally gets an emergency call from Carla needing her at the factory now for about an hour.  Kevin says he’ll go through the books with Molly and tell her where she went wrong, with a smirk.  Oh, that’s just so yucky.

More bad news for Sally when she shows up at Underworld to see that Hayley has agreed to come back and usurp her throne once more. Carla had invited Sally there to run Hayley up to speed on what’s been going on at the factory.  Sally looks very disappointed, Hayley guilty, and Carla just plain bitchy.  Kevin tempts Molly to go upstairs with him, at his house but Molly says it doesn’t seem right.  That’s because it isn’t.  Your entire relationship isn’t right.

Sally’s all upset over her usurping at Underworld and leaves in tears.  Meanwhile, Molly and Kevin come downstairs from he and Sally’s bedroom, post-coitus, with shit-eating-grins on their faces.  All the sudden, the door opens and Sally comes in in tears claiming how much she hates Carla.  They were almost caught!

Oh no, Claire’s back on the scene.  Claire comes into the butchers telling Ashley in a rage that she’s never taking Amy Barlow to school with the boys again.  Apparently Amy has a bit of a potty mouth on her.  Claire mentions that her boys now now the “d” word.  Ashley looks confused as to what the “d” word is.  Steve comes in and Claire tells Ashley that he’s going to have to tell Steve.  Claire tells Steve that Ashley wants a word and she’s going home for a calming herbal tea.  By “calming herbal tea” I hope she means “bottle of wine.”

Steve tells Ashley that he’s been taking golf lessons and doesn’t want Becky knowing about it.  Meanwhile, Becky’s been looking around the street to try and figure out where Steve is.  Kevin suggests to Becky that maybe Steve’s buying her a Christmas gift.  Becky’s hair looks gawd-awful, not sure what she’s doing there.

Steve finally shows up at the Rovers, and Becky questions where he’s been all day.  She asks him how suspicious he wants to look.  Becky tries to fish as to whether or not he was doing any Christmas shopping.  Steve pretends as though that was exactly what he was doing.  Only, we know it wasn’t.  Becky and Steve then begin to argue over which one of them swears more than the other.  Steve says that apparently Amy has been very foul-mouthed with the Peacock kids.

The Peacocks come into the Rovers and Becky asks her straight-out what they’re on about her Amy swearing.  Claire says she’s heard it herself.  Ashley has found out what the “d” word meant.  Ahem, a shortened name for Richard.  Haha.  Becky says that if Amy swore, it’s because her Josh started it.  Claire tells Becky that Joshua does not swear.  Claire also mentions that Becky isn’t exactly Stephen Fry.  Claire tells Becky that she has a restricted vocabulary and has to resort to gutter language.  Becky tells her that she’ll have a restricted wind-pipe if she doesn’t quit it.  I wonder who’d win this scap?  Most likely Becky, but Claire would go in with fistacuffs raised.  Claire leaves in a huff and drags Ashley with her, before he’d even taken a sip of his pint.

Rosie comes into the cafe, nose held high, and tries to order a skinny latte from John.  Hayley tells her that she knows they don’t serve those, and if she’s going to make trouble to just leave now.  Rosie settles for a coffee and John tries to accomodate by whisking the skim milk and adding cocoa.  If Rosie was as traumatized as she says she was by John, she would never step foot in a place he works.   Hayley warns John to watch himself against Rosie Webster.

Later, John asks Rosie if she’s thought about going back into education.  Seriously, just leave it buddy.  Rosie tells him that since she had such a terrible time with her last teacher, she just doesn’t want to see the inside of a classroom ever again.  What a little git!  Hayley gives John an “I told ya so” look.

Rosie sees Carla and runs up to her telling her that if she needs any help at the factory, that she’s available.  Carla spits at her that available could be her middle name then brushes past her with a shoulder shove.  Me-ow!  It’s always nice to see Rosie get insulted though.

Sundry Expenses: Mon Nov 23, 2009 Corrie Episode Review

Written by Jayne Hollinson (7:30) and Jonathan Harvey (8:30), directed by Ian Bevitt

Sally’s distracted from complaining about Stape for a bit now that she can complain about the fact that she can’t believe she’s been working for a murderer.  Rosie figures that the scariest part of all this was how close she was to death in that hotel room with him.  Well, that’s always the risk you take when you try to seduce strange older men in hotel rooms.  Rosie wonders if the video of Carla kissing Liam that she showed Tony drove him to kill.  Actually, it’s EXACTLY what made him kill Liam.  Kevin says she can’t go thinking that.  Rosie and Sally wonder what will happen to the factory.  Sally asks for the books off Molly from Kevin before she leaves.

Molly arrives at the garage with the books.  Kevin tells her he wanted them back since Sally had been asking for them, and he was putting their motel costs through as expenses.  Molly called him an idiot, but Kev said that he put them down as “sundry expenses.”  Molly assumes that’s all she is, a sundry expense.  Kevin tells her that she’s worth ever penny of that sundry expense.  Ah, how romantic.

Sally comes by the garage and asks Tyrone for the books, only he can’t find them.  Sally roots through some rubbish and finds the books under some rags.  She is shocked at the state of the place and thinks she’ll have to take a hand to more than just the books.    Sally is in the office with the books mashing the calculator telling Tyrone that it just doesn’t add up.  Sally says that according to the books, their profits are down, but it should be rosier.  She also says there’s loads of expenses that have been entered wrong, and she couldn’t for the life of her figure out what they’re for.

Meanwhile, Kevin and Molly are racking up their sundry expenses in their motel room for the afternoon.  Kev’s phone rings while they’re canoodling on the bed.  It’s Sally, so he ignores it.  Then Molly’s phone rings, and it’s also Sally.  They wonder what she wants.  Sally leaves some messages asking Kevin to call her ASAP since he’s got some explaining to do.  Kevin figures that he has to go home and face the music.

Kevin comes home to Sally’s sour face and she demands to know why he didn’t answer his phone.  Kev comes up with some lame excuse.  Sally asks Kevin how could he.  How could he let his books get in such a state.  Kev seems shocked that this is all Sally’s ever after.  Sally goes off about how useless that Molly is at keeping books and wants to know what the hell “sundry” expenses are.  Oh, no you don’t want to know.  Sally wants Kevin to bin Molly for her poor performance.

Maria’s still putting on her “unfit mother” routine leaving Helen and Barry to care for baby Liam.  Michelle comes by and is shocked that Maria wants Barry and Helen to take care of Liam.  Helen figures that it’s her who drove Maria to this – with the things she’s said.  She’s probably right.  They try to figure out how they can all best support Maria, since she can’t cope on her own.  Barry has a solution to their problems.

The Connors tell Maria that her son needs his mother, and with a bit of help it can happen.  Barry and Helen tell Maria that their offer is still open, if she wants to come and live with them in Ireland.  Maria doesn’t know what to think.  Maria leaves to go for a walk and to get some fresh air.

Audrey finds Maria crying on a bench and brings her into the salon back for a cuppa.  Maria figures that it’s like Tony is dead and all, since he never really existed.  Well, not the person she thought he was at least.  Maria feels even worse realizing that no one in her life (‘cept for Kirk) really liked Tony and that she should have listened to Natasha.  Maria figures that her baby would be much better off without her.  Audrey tells her that she is trying to punish herself by telling herself that she doesn’t deserve that one thing in the world she most loves, but she does.  Maria tells Audrey about the Connor’s offer to move to Ireland with them.  She feels it’d be nice to have help, but also doesn’t want to be weak.

Maria returns home and asks after baby Liam, and apologizes to everyone.  Helen apologizes for all the things she’s said.  She just felt so angry having both of her sons taken from her, it didn’t seem fair.  She also says that a bit of her felt jealous that Maria still had her son when she lots both of hers.  Maria surprises the Connors by telling them that she’d like to move to Ireland with them.  She needs help and a fresh start.  Maria answers a knock at the door, thinking its Michelle, to reveal Carla Gordon.  Uh oh.  She asks what Carla is doing there.  Helen comes to the door and spits at Carla that she’s not welcome there.  Carla asks what she’d ever done to Helen?  Helen says that she loathed Carla, and her gut instinct was right.  Helen tells Carla if she hadn’t been having her sordid little affair with her son, he’d still be alive.  Carla says she came back because she’s heard Tony was arrested and wants to know what’s going on.  Carla pleads with Maria that she needs to know what’s going on.  Maria tells Carla to come in, against Helen’s protests.  Carla can’t believe that Tony is a killer.

Maria tells Carla that Tony has confessed to Liam’s murder – the he paid someone else to kill Liam.  Maria tells Carla that Tony paid someone named Jimmy Dockerson, a car mechanic, to do the job.  Carla starts to sweat at the mention of Jimmy’s name.  Helen accuses Carla of being in on the whole thing.  Carla says she loved Liam, and she’d never have wanted him dead.  Maria asks Helen and Barry if she can’t have some time on her own with Carla.

Maria asks Carla if she knows anything about Liam’s death at the hands of Tony.  Helen brings down baby Liam and asks Carla if she’d like to say hello since she hasn’t met him yet.  Helen insists she’s holding out the olive branch.  Carla looks at baby Liam, all upset, and says that he’s beautiful.  Carla says she swears to Maria that she didn’t know.  Carla says she left Tony because she told him that she loved Liam, and because her marriage couldn’t survive her grieving for Liam.  She said she left, because she realized that she didn’t love Tony anymore.  She asks Maria if she loved Tony and Maria nods her head yes.  Carla tells Maria she’s sorry and embraces her in a hug.

Carla sees Leanne and Leanne asks how she is.  Carla says that she’s got to go to see police, and she’s stopping in a hotel in town since she can’t go back to her flat.  Leanne asks if she knew anything, and Carla asks her how she could even think that.  Carla asks Leanne not to tell Janice since she doesnt want the factory witches to know she’s back.

Carla is at her police questioning, by police.  She must be nervous.  Carla asks if Tony will be charged for Liam’s murder, even if he didnt actually do it.  The detective tells her that since Tony orchestrated it, he’ll be charged.  They tell her that Tony will also be charged with the attempted murder of Roy Cropper.  Carla is shocked, clearly Maria didn’t tell her everything.  Carla figures that none of this makes any sense.  The detective seems slightly suspicious of Carla.  Carla leaves the police station with tears in her eyes.

Becky stops by the Croppers to see how Roy and Hayley are doing.  Becky asks Roy if she remembers the Darling Buds of May where they never said “perfect”, but always “perfec.”  Hayley wishes life were more “perfec.”  Becky agrees and looks somewhat sad.  Maybe there is trouble in paradise for her and Steve.  Becky tells Roy that he’s got to face the world sometime, so encourages him to go back to work.  Hayley seconds that notion.  Roy says he’ll leave when he’s good and ready.

Audrey arrives on the street and sees the For Sale sign on Gail’s front lawn and wants to know what’s going on.  Gail tells her mother than her and Joe are moving because they decided to downsize.  David figures it’s an attempt to get rid of him.  No David, that’s merely a fringe benefit.  Gail reminds David that the world doesnt revolve around him.  Audrey assumes Gail is doing this for the money beacuse of Joe and his unemployment.  Gail tells Audrey it’s none of her business.  Is she new here?  This is Corrie.  Everything is everybodys business.  Audrey also learns of Joe and Gail’s engagement.  Audrey knows that Gail didn’t tell her because she knew how she’d react.  Gail claims she was right to, since Audrey’s all “purse lips and grimaces.”  Haha.  Audrey accuses Joe of being a leech, and not to come to her when she needs bailing out.  Audrey leaves in a huff, and David follows with a nod.

David tries to put a damper on Gail’s day by telling her that it will be months before she can shift her house in this market.  That may be true, but not if the price is right.  The door rings, and David answers the door to the loan shark.  The loan shark asks to come in, and Gail lets him in unknowingly.  Gail gets rid of David and ushers in the loan shark.  Gail shows loan shark around, when Joe comes home and gets white as a sheet when he recognizes loan shark.  The loan shark asks if they’re planning to move far, and Gail informs him that they don’t know yet.  Joe follows loan shark out and Joe tells him that they’re selling the place to raise enough money to pay him back.  Oh, just thought of something.  If they get a flat where is Joe going to dock Gail Force?

In the salon, Audrey asks David how many times Gail is going to hook up with some dodgy man that is no good for her.  Audrey thinks that they got engaged while she was away because deep down she was embarrassed.  She figures that subconciously Gail knows she’s making a very dangerous move.  Audrey gets an invitation to the Weatherfield Council Christmas Party and is delighted.  It’s Audrey and a plus one.

Audrey boasts about her invite to the Weatherfield Council Christmas party to Freda and Norris at the Rovers.  It is the event of the season, after all.  Norris says he’d rather stay home sticking pins in his eyes.  Norris asks who shes going to take since he doesn’t see a dazzling queue of gentile homme making a path to her house.  Haha.  Audrey asks Norris if he’d do her the great honour of accompanying her to the Christmas bash at the town hall.

Gail complains about her mother in the Rovers later to Joe.  She says that her mother is so eager to point out the bad in people, unlike Gail who always tries to see the best in them.  Yes, she does see the good in everyone, almost to a fault.  Joe suggests that she make up with her mother for pity’s sake.  Gail says that her mother can’t stand Joe, so she can’t stand her mother.  Joe nails it on the head when he calls her childist, but Gail insists that her mother makes her feel childish.  Speak of the devil, Audrey walks in and Joe and Gail leave.

Looks like Dev has arrived for his golf lessons, and an attractive young woman comes up to him and introduces herself as his golf coach.  Dev, of course is shocked, thinking the coach would be some older chap.  Dev of course puts is foot in his mouth not knowing she’s his golf coach.  He’s bloody terrible at golf, by the by.

Dev’s coach tells him he might need a few more lessons before he can compete in the open.  Dev thinks that’s great as it means he gets to spend some more time in her company.  Dev tries to ask her out, and she tells him that she prefers a beer.  Dev knows just the place, but asks her if she can keep mum about being a golf instructor since he doesn’t want Steve to know about his training.  So, THIS is where the whole golf side-bit was going.

Dev goes into the pub with Bernie, his “solicitor” as he’s calling her.  Steve and Michelle gossip about whether or not Dev is seeing her, since he is a social climber.  Steve doesn’t believe for a second that Bernie’s a solicitor, since Dev’s always had dodgy taste in birds.  Could it be, that Steve knows that Bernie is a golf pro?

Later Michelle catches Steve watching Dev and Bernie, and figures Steve is ogling Bernie.  Steve asks Dev if he’s in trouble with the law, since he’s with his solicitor.  I knew it!  Steve sidles up next to Bernie while Dev is in the loo and asks her how long Dev’s been having lessons for.  Bernie tells Steve that Dev’s just started so he’s got a bit of catching up to do with Steve.  Steve asks Bernie to stay mum since if Becky finds out how much he’s been spending on lessons, she’ll kill him.  Oh, so maybe Becky thinks Steve’s been playing away, when he’s really been coaching away all this time?  Bernie tells him her lips are sealed.

Ryan, Ben, Sophie and Sian are walking home from school and they see Michelle walk by.  Ben remarks that he thinks Michelle is dead brave and noble.  Oh, the beginnings of a school boy crush.

Poor Girl: Fri Nov 20, 2009 Corrie Episode Review

Written by Lucy Gannon (7:30) and Stephen Russell (8:30), directed by David Kester

The next morning at Maria’s, Maria feels full of unanswered questions, and Audrey agrees.  Michelle has spent the night, and Ryan shows up for some toast.  Michelle tells him to sit down and tells him about what’s happened.  Ryan is sobbing “no” in the next room.  He’s not a very good actor, who plays him.  Maria feels responsible for Ryan’s upset.  Audrey tries to tell her that it’s not her fault what has happened.

Ryan is angry that Maria let Tony live there, but Michelle insists it’s not her fault.  Ryan is angry, but wants to go to school anyway.  Does anyone care?   Ryan returns home later and Michelle consoles him.  Ryan wants to kill Tony.  Michelle says they all feel like that, but they won’t do it.  No, because then they’d BE Tony.   Ryan starts packing his bag and says he’s going.  He figures that ever since they came to that place, everything’s been bad.  He is right, maybe they should go after all.  Bye Michelle!  Ryan wants to go to Ireland to live with Mammy Connor.  Michelle insists that he call his grandparents first.

Maria is inside the house and throwing random things that remind her of Tony into a trash bag when Kirk and Fiz arrive.  Audrey updates them on the Tony-killing-Liam story and they’re in obvious shock.  Maria wants to get rid of everything that Tony has touched.  Maria figures that Tony is everywhere and she’ll never be able to get rid of him.  Kirk tells Maria that she should have called him, he’s never far away.  Michelle says that her mother called, but she couldn’t tell her of what happened, so she had her put her dad on and told him.  The Connors aren’t come right away, since Michelle held them off.  Michelle tears up to Audrey that it feels like she’s got to look after everyone.

Everyone tries to get Maria up and out of the house for some fresh air.  Fiz tries to assure Maria shes going to be fine, but she says she can’t go out and face everyone.  She’s too ashamed over what has happened and refuses to leave her house.

Audrey finally leaves Maria and Liam alone, telling Maria shes very proud of her and how shes been handling this.  Maria says she’s happy for the time alone.

Looks like Ryan’s not going after all.  Oh well, win some, lose some.  Ryan tells Michelle that her parents are at the airport, here in Manchester.

Well, just when I thought I’d wiped my hands of her, she’s back: Mammy Connor.  Helen can’t figure out why Tony would do this to Liam.  Michelle tells her that Liam was having an affair with Carla, Tonys wife.  The Connor’s can’t believe it.

Maria’s at home crying along with baby Liam, when she hears Mammy Connor knocking at the door asking to be let in.  Maria meets them at the door and says she’s so sorry.  Helen gives her a hug and consoles her.  Helen asks why Maria didn’t tell them about Liam and Carla.  Wait, didn’t she?  I’m sure she told them that Liam was unfaithful to her, at least.  Maria said she didn’t want them to know that about Liam.  Helen can’t help herself and asks Maria was she was thinking, and if she was shacking up with Tony since Liam cheated on her with Carla.  Maria tells Helen what we’re all thinking that she’s got a tiny mean mind, and says she’s going out.

When she’s gone, Barry tells Helen that she should think before she speaks.  Helen just figures that Barry lets people walk all over him.  Barry wants to keep his grandson in his life, and realizes that Maria could take him out of their lives at any time she wants.  Helen says that Maria wouldn’t do that, but Barry argues that he would if he were her.  Barry puts his foot down and tells Helen that she’s to apologize to Maria when she returns and that she’s never to accuse Maria.

In the Rovers, everyone talks about how shocked they are that Tony was a murderer, but some thought he always had something strange about him.  Barry comes into the Rovers and asks if Michelle’s seen Maria since she went out and hasn’t come back yet and is not answering her phone.  Kirk offers to go with Barry to look for Maria.  Where could she be?

Kirk brings the Connors to the cemetary and they find Maria at Liam’s grave with baby Liam.  Helen apologizes to Maria saying she only did her best and didn’t deserve to get manipulated by a murderer.  Maria tells Helen she doesn’t feel capable and that she’s not fit to be Liam’s mother.  Helen tells her of course she’s fit, she’s got to be.  Maria tells Helen to take baby Liam, and she runs off leaving Liam there with the Connors and Kirk.  Que baby Liam’s crying.

Roy seems to be having trouble sleeping and has been prescribed sleeping pills as a result, eventhough he insists he doesnt require them.  Roy says that sitting around remembering everything doesnt help.

Becky and Steve pop into the cafe with some train magazines for Roy.  Becky’s not happy that Steve’s golfing over spending time with her.  Is Becky turning into a golf widow already?  The factory girls come into the cafe and bombard Hayley with questions regarding Tony Gordon and the police.  Becky can see that Hayley is overwhelmed, so she helps her out behind the counter until John arrives.  The factory girls keep harassing Hayley for details and she’s had enough, and tells them to “shut up, just shut up.”  Hayley tells them that Tony Gordon has killed Liam Connor.  Janice replies, “The baby?”  To which Hayley corrects her and asks her how stupid is she?  That’s rhetorical.

Dev and Steve head off for their golf game.  They argue about whose car they should drive, since the winner will be celebrating and drunk.  Therefore they agree to get a cab.  Lloyd tells Steve that they’re all booked up.  Steve points out the irony that he owns a cab firm but can’t get a cab.

Dev and Steve are at the golf club, and there seems to be a problem with Dev’s guest membership.  His guest status has elapsed.  Dev slaps his wallet and asks them how he extends it.  The gentleman tells him that he doesn’t – he’d have to apply for full membership.  The man tells him that to apply, there is a waiting list that is about five years on average.  Steve pipes up that he’s a guest member and they get a spot in the afternoon.  Steve gets Dev to buy him lunch before the game – oh wait, he can’t because he’s not a member.  Steve huffs away and Dev follows but not before tripping over his golf bag.  Haha.

Only, Steve’s pride is only short lived, as it is revealed that he was a guest member of Paul Connor, who has passed away quite some time ago.  Now, they will have to pay an extra 50 pounds each time they want to play there.  Where is this going?  The golf manager tells them that one of their members has passed over, so there’s a vacancy.  Erm, shouldn’t that go to whomever is on the 5-year waiting list next?  Dev and Steve argue over who’s going to be the member, and who’s going to be the guest.  The decide that whoever wins a game of golf will receive the prize of “member.”  Dev grabs a golf lessons brochure from the desk before leaving.

Becky comes by Gail and Joe to congratulate them and lets Gail know that the same dress she wore at her wedding is still for sale, if Gail’s interested in being her bridal twin.  I’ll say that’s a no.  Gail talks with Becky about her dress as Joe gets phone call that spreads a look of confusion over his face.  Joe tells Gail the call was about a possible job.

Joe’s debt-collector shows his face again and is tooling around with Joe’s boat, wondering if his kids are old enough for one.  The loan shark tells Joe that his debt has doubled as of today – that’s what happens when he misses his payments.  How is that?  The loan shark threatens him that he better not miss next week’s payment, or worse will happen to him.  Joe looks like he’s about to have a heart attack.

Gail comes home later with all her shopping and Joe is busy fretting and wringing his hands in the kitchen.  Gail notices Joe’s mood and asks him what’s wrong.  Joe admits to Gail that he’s in terrible debt.  David walks in right then.  He’s got a knack for walking in at the right time, doesn’t he?  Gail tells him to leave, this is private.  Once alone, Joe tells Gail that he owes thousands, and thousands, and thousands of pounds.  He’s completely broke and he doens’t know what else to do.

Gail is overwhelmed looking over all of Joe’s debt paper work.  She asks how it happened, and he said he just kept getting in over his head trying to make investments to pay of debts, and only getting into more debt.  Gail tells Joe she needs to get some air, and leaves.  Gail returns and tells Joe that she thinks she should sell the house, becuase then they can pay off his debts and the mortgage, and there’d be enough left for a flat for them.  Joe hugs Gail in relief over hearing this.  I wonder what Audrey will have to say?

Joe asks if Gail is sure she wants to sell her house.  Gail tells him that it’s only money – they can be them anywhere.  Joe says, again, that he really doesn’t deserve her.  Gail and Joe are frantically cleaning the place in preparation for the estate agent’s visit.  David comes downstairs but Gail quickly tells Joe NOT to tell David that the house is on the market.  The phone rings and David picks it up for it to be estate agent, of course.  Gail tells David that she was going to tell him.  Gail and Joe tell David that neither of them care what he thinks.  I hope that Gail and Joe get a flat for TWO.  Gail says that it’s time David grew up and that he doesn’t need to know anything more about their business.

It’s the 20th, Jesse’s birthday, and Eileen asks him if he’s got a booking today, but he says he hasn’t.  She remarks that maybe they should make the most of it and do something later.  Jesse’s hesitant but agrees to meet her for a pint at 5:30.

Eileen can tell that Jesse is avoiding her, so she finally confronts him about it being his birthday.  He asks how she found that out, and she says she searched through his wallet.  She also tells him she’s ordered a limo for a big night out surprise.  Jesse tells her that he always does the same thing for his birthday, and didn’t think she wanted to join in: his mother does him a birthday tea.  Eileen says she’ll go, they booked the limo, may as well use it.  Jesse doesn’t look too thrilled that she’s coming.

Later, Eileen and Jesse enter the Rovers and it doesn’t sound like Eileen was very happy about spending the evening with Jesse’s family.  Why are they together?  Eileen reckons that she knows where she stands in the pecking order: below every person in his family and somewhere short of a parrot.  Eileen walks out in a huff, but Jesse purposely doesn’t follow her and orders a pint instead.

Blanche finds out from Peter that George is coming over for dinner and volunteers for her and Deirdre to do the dinner at theirs since Peter’s busy as it is.  That Blanche just wants to see more of George, clearly.  Peter tries to halt her, but there’s no stopping our Blanche.

George comes over to the Barlows for supper and brings Eva along with him this time.  Haha, Blanche shows up at the door of the living room with, as Simon would call it, a “funny face on” a whole lot of rouge on her cheeks.

Blanche of course, manages to manipulate the dinner situation by drinking too much wine and fawing over George.  Blanche shares with all of us her thoughts on current society: “Kids on every corner, lurking and spitting, pavements knee deep in dog-do, murderers running factories.  Oh, it’s not like it was ‘round here.  Was a time when stupid people with nowt to steal could leave the doors open!”  Haha.  George tries to neutralize the situation by telling her that there’s good and bad everywhere.

Blanche opines that there’s good and bad in this very room.  Blanche does what she does best, and pulls out the Barlow’s dirty laundry in front of guests.  Haha, Blanche is completely inebriated and trying to slap her own hand.

Well, Blanche’s little routine didnt go over well with George.  He didnt like the fact that Simon’s father was a drunk and that his girlfrind Leanne was a prossie.

Back at the Bookies, George walks in and apologizes for the way he reacted early on.  George tells them that his mother was a drunk, but she never had the courage to face up to it.  George figures whatever they’ve done it means nothing to him.  George tells them that he’s done things far worse than either of them could do.  George tells him that he abandoned his child.  Peter tells him that Lucy didn’t hate him, but George says that she should have done.  George thanks them for welcoming him into their family and Simon reminds him that he is family.  George comes back with a huge bouquet of flowers for Leanne (not from Dev’s), and an iPod for Peter as a sorry gift.  Peter says it’s too much but George says it isn’t since they’ve been generous to him with their hearts, and this is tiny by comparison.

Confessions: Thu Nov 19, 2009 Corrie Episode Review

Written by Mark Wadlow, directed by David Kester

We start where we left off last time, with Roy floundering around in the canal trying to keep his head above water, with Tony overlooking from the bridge.  Suddenly, Roy gives up his struggle and sinks to the bottom.

Meanwhile, at home, Hayley is worried about Roy since Tony is on the loose.  Maria is wittering on that “it’s Tow-neh” and Hayley just loses it on her asking her when she’s going to realize what’s staring her in the face.  I know Maria’s distressed, but it’s really annoying when Hayley’s panicking over Roy’s life here.  Hayley apologizes for shouting at her, but Maria tells her she’s right.  Maria decides to have Michelle come over to hers to console her, rather than to help Hayley find Roy.

Instead, Hayley doesn’t know where to go, so she heads to the Rovers to find Becky.  Becky, of course, has no idea what’s going on.  So Hayley catches her up quickly and they head to the canal.

Tony watches as the water that Roy’s under becomes very still, and almost walks away, but has a second thought (of guilt?) to go back, jump in and get Roy out.  He manages to find Roy and pull him out.  Tony performs mouth-to-mouth on Roy to revive him.   Roy’s breathing again, and is shocked to see who is standing over him.  Tony walks away from the whole scene, leaving Roy in shock and, seeing a group of bats fly around above his head.  Maybe it wasn’t an excuse after all?

Michelle arrives at Maria’s place and Maria tells her to sit down.  Maria tells Michelle the whole story to her shock and dismay.  Maria wonders if their relationship was all an act, so maybe he could kill her or her baby.  Maria instantly calls Audrey to see if Liam’s okay, then asks her to get in a taxi to her place, she’d explain when she gets there.

Hayley and Becky arrive at the canal and are shouting for Roy and find him wet, and sitting up against the wall.  Roy tells them how Tony Gordon tried to kill him, then changed his mind.  They ask where Tony is, but Roy says he didn’t let him know before he stalked off.  Haha.

We see Tony walk straight to the police station.  Oh, and he looks even better wet.  He goes to the front desk and tells the front desk clerk that he’s come to confess to murder.  The detective that had questioned Tony earilier gets wind of this, and goes to question him.

Hayley and Becky take Roy to the hospital to make sure he’s okay.  In the hospital, a police officer approaches them to tell them that Tony Gordon’s in a custody suite after handing himself in.

In the interrogation room, Tony Gordon admits to arranging the murder of Liam Connor.  He says he paid the driver of the car that killed him and then gives up Jimmy Dockerson.  He says he planned and executed the whole thing with great precision.  Tony tells them he came up with it when he found out that Carla was sleeping with Liam.  He said his motive was jealousy.  The detective says that loads of men get jealous.  Tony tells them that most men don’t have the means or the guts to knock people off.  Tony lets them know that the only reason he’s there is because he walked through that door – they had nothing on him.  The detective asks him why he’s confession now, and Tony says he can’t live with himself anymore.

Roy goes over the details of his horrific evening and is intriguied by the fact that Tony came back and saved him.  Roy doesn’t believe that Tony is a killer at heart, and he suspected that all along.  What?  You mean Tony’s not a psychopath?  No, but he’s still a killer, heart or not.  Bad intentions are bad intentions.  Roy is just being egotistical here thinking that his whole “conscience” lectures did something to Tony, let’s be real.  At home, Hayley insists that Roy go to bed, but he’d rather record what he saw that night in his bat journal.  He’s got bigger fish to fry now, apparently.

Audrey arrives at Maria’s, and as Maria’s explaining to Audrey the phone rings and it’s Hayley.  Hayley updates Maria on the situation.  Before she can explain, she leaves baby Liam with Audrey again, as her and Michelle head down the station so Maria can see Tony.

Tony tells the police that he lives for Maria Connor and baby Liam, and if he can’t have them – he may as well be locked up, key thrown away.  Maria arrives, but they can’t her any information.  The desk clerk then sees the detective on Tony’s case, and lets him know she’s there.  The detective requests to speak with her.  He brings her into an office and lets her and Michelle know that Tony has just confessed to killing Liam Connor.  Maria says she wants to see Tony, but they tell her that’s not possible but Maria begs so they let her in for 5 minutes.

Maria asks him why he did it.  Tony tells her he’d fallen in love with her, and if there was a way to hold onto it, he would have.  Maria says he’s sick for sleeping with his victim’s wife.  Tony tells her he thought he could have atoned for her sins.  Maria asks who would have been next to have an accident, her, Liam?  Tony insists he’d never lay a finger on that child.  Maria tells him that she loved him.  Tony says he regretted Liam’s death since the day it happened.  Tony says he confessed because he couldn’t live with himself any longer.  Maria says it’s a pity he had to live at all.  Maria says he deserves to be hanged, and she’d watch, then she’d cheer, then she’d dance on his grave.  These words bring tears to Tony’s eyes as he tells her he loves her.  Maria breaks down in tears the second she leaves the interrogation room.  Poor thing.  Wait until Mammy Connor hears about this!

A Good Man: Mon Nov 16, 2009 Corrie Episode Review

Written by Simon Crowther (7:30) and Joe Turner (8:30), directed by David Kester

Maria is concerned that Tony’s working too hard, and that the stress is too much for her heart.  However, she leaves baby Liam with him for the day while she goes to a health spa.

Tony goes to the cafe and asks Anna if she knows then the Croppers will be returning.  They’ll be back sometime that afternoon, John informs them.  Anna gets mad at him for not taking messages.  Already sucking at his new job, he can’t do anything right.

Tony returns to his office, but is in for a surprise visit from a local Weatherfield DS team.  They introduce themselves and let Tony know that they’d like him to answer a few questions for them down at the station.  Tony plays ignorant and tells them he assumes this is regarding the erstwhile Luke Strong.  They tell him it’s not about Mr. Strong, and he needs to come with them.  The whole factory overlooks this interaction with concern.  Outside, the DS tells Tony that he’s being arrested for making death threats to Roy and Hayley Cropper, and on the suspicion of the murder of Liam Connor.  Tony tells them that this is a mix up, but he’ll do whatever they request.

In the interrogation room, Tony tries to explain his side of the story to the detectives.  You know, that Roy is a crazy, and he’s just trying to live his life.  The detective tells Tony that they’ll be interviewing Maria, and asks if the thought of it makes him nervous.  Tony tells them, not at all.  This detective’s a real hard knock, but is he hard enough to crack this egg?  The detective eventually lets Tony leave, but warns him to stay away from the Croppers.

The Croppers are back, and they’re walking on egg shells.  Fiz comes in to gossip about Tony being taken away by the police, and he never came back.  Fiz asks if the Croppers know anything about it seeing their reserved faces, and Roy tells her yes, they do.

At the Rovers, the factory girls gossip over what happened to Tony.  They’re coming up with all sorts of things such as Carla having been in a high-speed chase in America, or her having been in a crime of passion.

Tony arrives home finally and Maria tells him the good news about her day.  Too bad he can’t do the same.  She leaves to pick up Liam from Audrey’s and bumps into Fiz.  Fiz asks her what the police wanted from Tony. This is clearly the first Maria has heard of it.  Fiz also tells her that she’s just spoken to Roy and Hayley and thinks it has something to do with them.

Later, Maria asks Tony what the police wanted.  Tony tells her that they wanted some information on Luke Strong’s finances.  Maria looks disbelieving since Fiz told her that it wasn’t about Luke Strong.  She asks Tony why he didn’t tell her, and that it wasn’t about Luke, it was about Roy and Hayley.  Uh oh, someone’s got some ‘splaining to do!  Tony tells her that Roy and Hayley went to the police to complain about him, saying that he threatened to kill them.  He tells her about how he told Roy he was responsible for Liam’s death on his presumed death bed, and how Roy took it to be literal.  Maria can’t understand why Roy didn’t understand that.  Maria thinks it’s quite a thing for someone to make up.  Tony tells her that Roy is vindictive and completely insane.  As Tony tells her more, and walks closer, Maria slowly walks backwards, afraid and confused.  Could she be thinking back to her own original accusations against him regarding Liam’s death?  Maria sneaks off through the kitchen and out the back door, which leaves Tony with tears welling up in his eyes.  Tony opens a drawer and takes the set of Roy Cropper’s keys out, then walks over to the cafe with a very angry look on his face.  What is he going to do now?

The Croppers are tidying up at the end of the day and reflecting on how good a job that John is doing.  Hayley notes that it’s good to have people you can rely on.  Oh, yes, ex-cons are some of the most reliable folk.  Unlike future cons, such as Tony Gordon.  They bid John goodnight outside, as Tony stares meacingly from across the street in the builder’s yard.  Hayley is worried for Maria, if Tony is being questioned by the police she wonders if Maria knows, and how she feels.  Yes, let’s not forget about the real victim in all of this.  Someone calls for Roy from the Bat Conservation Society.  This is rather a funny scene where Roy forcibly laughs out loud at something the other person has to say.  My, he really is awkward.  Roy tells Hayley that there’s been a sighting of a bat colony near the canal.  Eventhough it’s late in the year for that, Roy seems interested.  Hayley encourages him to go.  Gee, I wonder who called in that little tip.

Maria returns home from her walk-of-terror and can’t find Tony anywhere.  Maria calls Audrey and asks if she can keep Liam longer.

Meanwhile, when the lights are turned at at Roy’s Rolls, Tony walks over, and uses his keys to let himself in.  All the sudden Tony can hear the Croppers coming down the stairs so he hides behind the counter.  Roy tells Hayley he feels bad about leaving her alone, but she insists she’ll be fine.  Roy leaves, then Hayley deadbolts the door and goes upstairs leaving a thwarted Tony Gordon in the dark.  Hayley goes upstairs and settles down with a sandwich in front of the tele when she hears some banging downstairs.  Couldn’t be a knife-weilding Tony Gordon down in the cafe could it?  Knife in hand, it seems that Tony had accidentally knocked over a chair when he heads for the door.  Just as he does, he hears Maria knocking on the door looking for Roy.  Tony hides behind the counter again as Hayley comes down to open the door for her.  Maria busts in the door claiming that she needs to see Roy, and asks what he’s said to the police.  Maria asks Hayley if Tony had confessed to killing Liam.  Hayley tells her yes, but not only that, when they confronted him he’d threatened to do the same to him.  Maria bursts out in tears of confusion and horror.  Meanwhile, Tony is behind the counter gripping the knife and sobbing.  Hayley suggests that Maria go upstairs with her, and Roy will be back soon and she can talk to him.  Blood oozes from Tony’s firm grip on the knife as he holds back his sobs with tears running down his face.  So much for his plans of knifing Hayley to death.

Maria is sobbing and tells Hayley about how much of an angel Tony has been for her.  She just can’t figure it all out.  Hayley doesn’t know what to say to comfort her.  Maria says that Tony’s a good man, it can’t be true.  Maria says she would know if she was living with a murderer, or if a murderer was feeding her baby.  Would you?  Hayley reminds her that it wasn’t that long ago that Maria was accusing Tony of murder and shouting it from the roofs.  Maria says she was grieving, and pregnant, and having a break-down.  Maria is trying to reason for why Tony said he killed Liam.  She says she needs to see Tony, but Hayley thinks he’s at the police station and Maria informs her that he isn’t, because they’ve let him go on no evidence.  All the sudden a terrified look crosses Hayley’s face as her heart drops into her stomach.

Roy is under a bridge in the canal with his thermos looking for bats, presumably.  Tony is on his way over and walking with fervor.  He sees Roy sat there and pulls a knife from his jacket.  Tony’s enchroaching on Roy and all the sudden his cell phone rings, with Maria calling, and Roy hears it and looks up to see Tony standing there.  Roy asks him what he’s doing there.  Tony says he’s come to see the wild life, and asks if Roy’s seen any bats.  He then tells Roy he hasn’t been sleeping well lately, bad dreams, beacuse of him.  He says his conscience was bothering him and he thought it was time to do something about it.

Back at the cafe, Maria says she doesn’t care what Roy and Hayley say, this has to be a mistake.  She leaves to go find Tony against Hayley’s concerns.  Hayley reminds her that her and Roy are not stupid and Tony gave them enough of a threat to go to the police.  Hayley tells Maria that she knows the truth.  Maria says that she knows Tony Gordon would give his life for her and her baby.

Tony tells Roy he can’t run away, and that the police let him leave.  Roy tells him that Hayley knows where he is, and that if he’d not back by a certain time she’ll call the police.  Tony says he was there when he left, since he has keys and he’s been watching him.  Tony says it’s his turn to haunt him now and that everytime he sees a shadow, it’s him.  Tony tells him this is all his fault.  He was making amends and Roy took it all away.  Roy asks if he’s done anything to Hayley.  Tony says he’s never killed a man in cold blood – until tonight!  He pulls out the knife and Roy immediately grapples him to the wall causing Tony to drop the knife.  A struggle ensues and they’re on the edge of the canal, where Roy tells Tony he can’t swim.  Tony says “good” and pushes him to his watery death, presumably. Roy flounders and screams for help as Tony watches from above on the bridge with his signature sinister stare.

Gary Windass has been looking through Army Life periodicals.  Oh, Gary Windass in fatigues, Christmas is coming early this year.  Gary goes into the Rovers with his army brochures and asks why everyone’s so down on the army.  His mother points out that it makes no sense.  Anna suggests he get a job in a call centre, be a plumber or pull pints.  Such high aspirations she has for her son, that Anna.

Julie marches over to Eileen and rips into her about getting her fired from her Hiyalowa job.  Julie insists, again, that they were only professional partners, not lovers!  Julie tells Eileen to grow up, that she’s too old to be that paranoid.  They start grabbing each other’s ears and fighting like little sisters, when Julie insists that she doesn’t fancy Jesse.  Eileen’s not believing it, but Julie tells her if she’s so paranoid and if her boyfriend’s reduced to lying, then maybe she needs to re-evaluate her relationship.

Julie sees Jesse’s van roll up and chews him out.  Jesse freaks out at the sight of her and tells her that if Eileen sees them conversing – she’ll go ballistic, then runs out of sight.

Eileen complains about Jesse and tells Lloyd that she feels betrayed by him by not telling her that it’s his 40th birthday on Friday.  Lloyd doesn’t think it’s the worst lie ever, but Eileen still stands that a lie is a lie.  Eileen thinks Jesse in a two-faced swindler.  Lloyd thinks that if she feels that way, she should tell him to his face.  She says she just might.

Later, Eileen has told Sean about Jesse’s birthday and his lie about it.  Sean figured him to be well past 40 already, as did I.  Eileen tells Jesse that they’re going to go to the Rovers on November 20th.  She asks if there’s anything significant about that date, but he says there isn’t.

In the Rover’s Steve tries to figure out reasons why Jesse’s birthday might not be his birthday including him lying when he got his driver’s licence.  Steve also suggests that he might have a secret identity.  Eileen remarks that he’s already General Custard, how could he have another secret identity?  Haha.  Lloyd suggests that Eileen plan a big surprise and force Jesse to celebrate his birthday whether he likes it or not.  Eileen likes this idea.

Becky’s back from Greece and it seems like she’d rather still be on holiday.  Wouldn’t we all?

Gail is going to ask Ted to walk her down the aisle at her wedding.  Gail asks Ted at dinner and he tells her that he’s extremely honored.  They toast to the future.  Oh, the future.  *shudder* David picks up Zoe from the bus stop and they chatter on about who’s grandfather is hotter.  Is it just me or is David Platt a completely different person now?  Zoe says she doesn’t know why David doesn’t like Joe.  David says it’s because Joe’s an ex-druggie who tried to ruin his mother’s life and because David’s a psycho that doesn’t like much anyone new in his life.  David reckons the only man good enough to marry his mother was Martin, his father.  Until Martin left, of course.

Sitting Duck: Fri Nov 13, 2009 Corrie Episode Review

November 13 2009

Written by Chris Fewtrell (7:30) and Simon Crowther (8:30), directed by John Anderson.

Hayley can’t sleep over thinking about Tony’s threat.  She never wants to go into work again.  Hayley’s sorry she doubted Roy and think they should go to the police.  Roy figures the police won’t believe them, since Tony’s already been questioned.  Roy thinks the best tactic is to walk by him routinely and act as his conscience.  Hayley reminds Roy that Tony might not have one, since he proposed to his victim’s wife.  Roy figures that Tony’s on the brink, and he’ll just have to hold his nerve.  Hayley thinks Roy should at least go to the police to tell them that Tony’s threatened him.  That way, if Tony finds out he’s gone to the police, he won’t touch him.  Makes sense, but Roy thinks that might antagonize Tony further.  Hayley warns him that he’s playing with fire, and if he’s not careful, he’ll get burned.  Haven’t I been saying that all along?

Tony finds out that Hayley hasn’t shown up for work today, and lets Sally open up, then goes to visit the Croppers.  Oh, and he’s not happy.  When he arrives at the cafe, he finds that it hasn’t opened, so he opens the mailbox and shouts for Hayley.  Hayley and Roy are hiding upstairs bricking it, and trying to figure out what to do.

Hayley throws on her nightdress and goes downstairs to tell Tony she’s come down with an awful sickness, but Tony notices she’s wearing a skirt and heels under her robe.  Roy tells her that he hopes she’ll be better, since it’s hard enough trying to sort things out with Roy, and now sorting things out with her too.

Hayley is sick with worry.  She looked into the eyes of a murderer, who told her that he’d sort her, just like he’d sort her husband.  Roy blames himself for having become obsessed with getting a confession, but he won’t allow Tony to threaten her.  He decides they will go to the police, without further adieu.

At the police station, Roy and Hayley have made their complaint against Tony, and the officer tells them that they’ll be in touch with Tony, and they’ve done the right thing.  Roy and Hayley decide to take a little camping trip to get away from the street for a while. Before they can leave, Anna knocks on the door and they let her in, then Tony follows.  He realizes they’re “escaping.”  Looks like Anna’ll be working on her own that weekend.  Then, as if it can’t get more awkward, John Stape walks in and asks if they need any help at the cafe since they’re going away.  Looks like John’s got work at least!  Sally sees him in the cafe and is NOT happy about it!

Tony inquires with Anna as to where the Croppers went camping.  Tony fibs and says that Hayley had a file of his and wanted to nip upstairs and see if he could get it.  Anna says she’s not comfortable with letting him up there alone, and says if it calms down, she’ll take him up there later.  It’s time and Anna takes him upstairs.  They don’t find anything, so they decide to leave.  Tony holds open the door for Anna, and Anna goes out, leaving Tony behind to snatch some keys off the kitchen counter.

Tony looks from down the street as police knock on his front door.  He seems shocked to see them there.  Maria comes home with Liam from the library, and was worried when he heard her at the door.  What would have happened had Maria been home when the police were there?  Surely, the police will return.

Sally’s so adament about getting rid of Stape, even Rosie’s had enough of it.  Kevin says he’s going to make a proper appointment with a solicitor and see where they stand.  I’m sure they could get some kind of restraining order if Rosie wanted one.  Kev goes to see the solicitor who tells him that there’s nothing they can do about Stape, unless he causes a stir.  Kev “hypothetically” asks what would happen if he left his wife for another woman.  The solicitor tells him that he’d have to sell the family home and give half his business to his wife – it’ll be messy.  Well, that doesn’t sound good!

Kevin meets Molly at their hotel rendez-vous.  Kev realizes that Molly is still angry, and complains that his affair is worse than being married!  Funny how that happens, isn’t it?  Molly demands to know all about his previous affairs.

John figures he needs to start earning, because he can’t keep sponging off Fiz.  Trouble is, not many jobs for failed kidnappers.  John decides to get dressed and finish off painting the frames outside.  Fiz thinks he’ll just be a sitting duck for Sally outisde.  John agrees, but notes that this time, he’ll have the paint in his hand.

Graeme comes by in his rickshaw with a ladder sticking out the back, and convinces John to enlist in his services to paint the upstairs windows to match the one he’s painting downstairs.  He’s a smooth mover, that Graeme.  Eddie Windass comes over and negotiates the hire of Graeme’s ladder for an hour.  What could be be up to?

It seems as though Kirk has outstayed his welcome at the Dobbs residence after tampering with Molly’s toaster dial.  Kirk reckons he best move on.  Tyrone lets Molly know that her attitude isn’t becoming.  He also tells her that Kirk is moving out, and he doesn’t blame him.  Molly apologizes, again, and uses her dad’s illness as an excuse.  Tyrone feels bad and tells her that her being happy is all that matters to him, and if she’s not – he’s not doing his job right.  The poor guy.

Jesse goes into Dev’s shop and throws a dozen chocolate bars into his basket.  Dev asks if he’s bullemic, and Sean notes that he’s only half bullemic – he’s got the binge part down.  Jesse says they’re for Simon Barlow as a promotional reward to advertise his show to his mates.  Oh, no one believes that.  Eileen tells him that he can’t go bribing kids into advertising for him.  Jesse fibs and says he needs to stoop that low, since he’s a one-man-act.  Eileen tells him that she’ll be Hiyalowa this afternoon, but Jesse declines her offer, much to Eileen’s suspicions.

Sean is suspicious that Julie has a new man in her life, since she’s been chatting on the phone with someone mysterious, and now taking off afternoon to do ‘things.’   Sean can’t help but gossip to Eileen about how he thinks Julie has a new man.  He tells Eileen that Julie’s taken the afternoon off to meet a fella.  Sean thinks that the man Julie’s with is attached – he’s knows an affair when he sees one.  The penny drops for Eileen, and she says she knows a rat when she sees one.  Jesse better watch out, as hell hath no fury, like an Eileen scorned.

Eileen has got Eddie spying on Jesse, all PI like.  Eddie tells Eileen that he’s not happy about sitting around and spying on Jesse – it makes him feel grubby.  Haha, heaven forbid.  Eddie sees Julie quickly hop into Jesse’s van and is stunned.  Eddie confirms that it’s Julie, and Eileen looks sickened.  Poor Eileen!

Jesse is grovelling to Eileen and trying his best to convince her that he’s not having an affair with Julie – it’s purely professional!  Jesse says he can’t do show without Julie.  Eileen comments that it sounds like a match made in heaven.  Jesse apologizes for going behind her back, but she shouldn’t have been suspicious.  Eileen makes Jesse choose between her or Julie.  Eileen stands by as Jesse calls Julie to tell her that she’s can’t be Hiyalowa anymore.

Stevey-boy’s back from holiday and telling Dev all about it.  John takes the opportunity to ask Steve if there’s any cab shifts available, but Dev reminds him he kidnapped a young girl (young woman, actually) in one of Steve’s cabs, so it’s not really what he wants to promote.  Dev also tells John that he can take his business elsewhere.  John leaves the shop without incident.

Steve goes over to Lloyd’s flat, and Theresa answers the door putting Steve into a state of shock.  Looks like Lloyd has some explaining to do.  Later, they meet in the cafe and Steve’s interested to know what Lloyd is doing with Theresa.  Lloyd tells Steve that she was just cleaning for him.  Steve accuses Lloyd of shacking up with a homeless woman.  Lloyd reminds him that Becky was homeless too.  Haha.  Theresa comes in and sits on Lloyd’s lap – so much for the cleaning lady ruse!